Michael Buble

I'm listening to Michael Buble right now (rhe song EVERYTHING). I lovvvvve him. I was going to tickets for my mom to see him when he comes to Virginia but he's going to be playing at the Richmond Coliseum which is the worst venue to see concerts at. I hope he comes back soon. His voice is so smooth and refreshing.

I haven't talked to Fred all day and I'm getting restless. I've been missing him a lot lately and when I don't talk to him I get really ancy. I feel more comfortable talking to him before I go to bed or during the day. I know Fred doesn't feel this way at all when I don't talk to him. He is perfectly happy being wrapped up in video games or watching sports with his buddies. I'm not saying I have to talk to him all the time. I just like hearing from him.

I dunno if Michael Buble is putting me in this mood, it's my anxiety, the rain, or early PMS signs. HMMMM....

10K

This morning I participated in the Monument Avenue 10K for the 2nd year in a row. It felt so good to cross the finish line with hundreds of strangers cheering me on! For those of you who don't know a 10k is 6 miles long. This race happend to be an exact 6.2 miles. Last year I did not train for the race and my body punished me by not allowing me to walk for the next few days after the race. BUT this year I've been going to the gym and jogging on the tread mill more and more. The other night I ran 3 miles and didn't even feel out of breath! I was so proud of myself considering that I've fallin out of tennis and the active lifestyle I once had. Recently though I've been starting to miss tennis (probably because of the warm weather and pretty days we've been having) and the great shape that I was once in. It's crazy running into old friends or seeing friends on facebook who have gained so much weight over the last few years. I just don't want that to be me. My dream would be to look like Jennifer Aniston when I'm 40 but I know that won't be the case. However, I can live an active life and stay in shape for me. Summer's right around the corner and I want to look good in my bikini and ofcourse for Fred so that his eyes do not wander.

I am not sure what time I finished the race in yet but I'm hoping to continue doing the 10K every year and knocking off my time even if it's only by a few mintues. Even though my legs are sore right now I feel GOOD about myself. I was able to go to the gym every night the other week but now that school has started again I'm only able to go tomorrow and Monday since I'm leaving for Fred's friday after work. Ideally I would like to hit the gym every night but that won't be able to happen until MAY. I just got to get rid of these huge thighs that I have.

DRIVING

I love driving home from work with the windows down, the sun still in the sky and my country music turned up loud. Hurry up MAY so I can be down with school FOREVER and spend my weekends in Arlington and with my friends AND NOT studying.

CONTENT

I got to see Ashley before she left.... yes that was all I wanted.

I wish we could have spent more time together
I wish she hadn't brought her boyfriend
I wish we could haven't opened up to each other more

But she seems happy. So becaues of that, I'm happy.

Here are the lyrics to one of my favorite songs written by John Mayer - WHEEL. I think it fits the mood for how I feel right now.

People have the right to fly

And will when it gets compromised

Their hearts say "Move along"

Their minds say "Gotcha heart"

Let's move it along Let's move it along

And airports see it all the time

Where someone's last goodbye

Blends in with someone's sigh

Cause someone's coming home

In hand a single rose

And that's the way this wheel keeps working now

That's the way this wheel keeps working now

And I won't be the last

No I won't be the last,To love her

And you can't build a house of leaves

And live like it's an evergreen

It's just a season thing

It's just this thing that seasons do

And that's the way this wheel keeps working now

That's the way this wheel keeps working now

And you won't be the first

No you won't be the first

To love me

You can find me, if you ever want again

I'll be around the bend

I'll be around,I'll be around

And if you never stop when you wave goodbye

You just might find if you give it time

You will wave hello again

You just might wave hello again

And that's the way this wheel keeps working now

That's the way this wheel keeps working now

You can't love too much, one part of it

I believe that my life's gonna see

The love I give

Return to me

I believe that my life's gonna see

The love I give

Return to me

I believe that my life's gonna see

The love I give

Return to me

I MISS MY FRIEND.

I met Ashley in college. We didn't become friends til halfway through our freshman year because I thought she was weird and she thought I was a bitch. After dressing up for St. Patrick's Day with our friends on the 3rd floor of Dillon....Ashley and I were inseperable. We roomed together for the next 3 years and her and I went through A LOT together. Ashley knew me better than anyone else and she was always there to listen. Even though Ashley took over our closet and minimal space with her shoes, clothes, purses, I'll never forget the nights we stayed up til 2 in the morning talking. Her car was covered with cd's I had made and we would drive around Bridgewater with the windows down singing at the top of our lungs. I miss that. Junior year she saved my life from a lot of things. I don't think anybody else would have done what she did for me in that moment. We turned 21 together, we danced til we were sore at Main Street and Highlawn, we kissed a lot of boys, we cried together when relationships ended, she was my DD, my makeup artist, my bestfriend. By senior year we couldn't wait to graduate. She had a steady boyfriend and was gone most weekends. I think we were both getting tired of living in such tight quarters that we argued every now and then but Ashley was still there. I remember one night she collapsed from problems with her thyroid I had to be carried out of the room by the boys next door because I was sobbing. I thought she was dying. She had been there for me through so much I didn't want anything bad to happen to her. Ashley was always taking care of me. She was my Mom. I don't know how I would have made it through college without her.

Even though Ashley and I both live in Richmond we rarely saw each other after graduation. Our schedules always conflicted or we were busy with our boyfriends. We still managed to talk and every time I did see her I was excited. We would always talk about "Remember at Bridgewater when..." Since that time I don't see Ashley as much. I miss her. I guess it's both of our faults but when I'm free she's not free and vice versa.

I haven't seen Ashley since October.

Yesterday was a really emotional day for me.

Ashley's birthday is the day before Valentine's Day. Last year I was able to take her to lunch for her birthday but this year I was going to be out of town visiting my boyfriend. I called her the day before her birthday and left her a voicemail. I didn't hear back. I called her the next week to see how her birthday went. I didn't hear back. I've called Ashely a lot but I have never been able to speak to her. I get frustrated because I miss her.

I woke up yesterday to a TEXT message from Ashley telling me she's moving to Georgia permanently on Tuesday (with her new bf, which is another story in itself). Keep in mind I've been trying to call Ashley for the longest time and all she can do is send me a text message saying she's moving and if I'm free to come to her going away dinner. How do you tell someone you've been friends with for so long that you're moving in a few days through text message. She didn't even give me a warning. I don't think she's told anyone else yet. Lately Ashley has been keeping to herself, avoiding our group of friends and shutting herself off. I had no idea she was planning on moving to Georgia. Or she was planning on moving there in 5 days.

I cried. I won't be able to go to her "going away dinner" next Tuesday because I'll be at a John Mayer concert. I texted her back (since that's the only way she likes to communicate now) saying that I'm free Sunday. I'm hoping she gets back to me and I can talk to her, see her, and get a picture with her before she leaves. But I'm so scared she's going to be busy and we won't be able to. I called our friend Kara yesterday crying because I know that when Ashley leaves I problably won't hear from her for a long time. She is living in Richmond now, 15 minutes away from me and doesn't talk to me. What's going to make her want to talk to me all the way from Georgia. I don't want to lose her as a friend.

As a friend I support her and I'm happy if moving to Georgia is what she wants and what she needs to do figure out her life. I would have just liked a little more warning, or I would have liked her to call me and talk to me about this awhile ago if this is something she's been thinking about for awhile. I don't know. A lot of emotions go through me when I think about Ashley and the memories we shared together and the fact that she's moving so far away. It hurts. I just hope that I can see her and tell her how much she means to me before she leaves next week.

Here are a couple pictures of Ashely and I from over the years